My wife thinks I'm the perfect husband, but I live a dark double life

Hey, I’m a man, 34 years old, and this is the first time I’ve told this to anyone. I’ve been married for two years, five years together. On the outside, I’m the perfect husband. I truly love my wife. We have great communication, hardly ever fight, and the sex is very good. We’re even planning to have our first child this year. But the reality is that I never closed my dating apps…

I remember the first one, Emma. I was 29 and she was 20. We ended up at my place while my girlfriend wasn’t home. It all escalated immediately; one moment we were talking, the next she was on her knees giving me the best blowjob of my life. I ended up fucking her against the living room window. The idea that someone might see us from the street turned us both on. I felt like shit the next day, but a month later? I was back at it.

I learned to search for them better. I only matched with girls living on the other side of town. I memorized my wife’s routine to know exactly when I could sneak away. I started being honest with them: I told them I was married and that I would provide “financial support” if we kept the arrangement discreet. I had never gotten so many matches. I always asked for medical tests before meeting. I wanted the minimum risk for me and for my wife.

Right now, I have three at the same time, and it’s an adrenaline and morbid thrill I can’t even describe.

Viv (24) is my go-to mistress. She’s been with me for two years. She’s tall, taller than me, a real Amazon. Big tits, big ass, and she’s obsessed with my size. She loves it when we fuck bareback. We’ve been going at it without a condom for a year because she’s on birth control. There’s nothing like the feeling of being inside a woman that beautiful and athletic, totally unprotected, knowing she’s mine.

Lily (23) is my petite one. I’ve been with her for a year. Small tits and a small butt, which makes her super easy to handle and move into any position. Her technique for oral is incredible, better than anything I’ve ever tried. Lately, she’s been asking me to record our encounters. I already have videos of her in all kinds of positions, screaming; it’s a death sentence if they’re ever discovered, but I can’t stop her.

Then there’s Myla (21). I met her 3 months ago. The first time, the condom broke because we were going at it so hard. From that second, she became my bitch. I can choke her, tie her up, dominate her completely. She doesn’t use birth control, so it’s even riskier, but I just pull out and come all over her. She’s the hottest and most perverted I’ve ever met; she craves BDSM and to be treated like an object.

It’s getting harder to manage. My wife isn’t working right now, so I have less time to sneak away. We plan to have a baby this year and I hope that will be the “brake” that forces me to stop. But I know it won’t. I’m an addict. I love the adrenaline. I love being a misogynist with them, being dominant, turning them into my whores. I love the secrecy of it all, coming home to my wife after filling up one of these perfect young girls with my cum. It makes me feel like a god.

I want to quit this addiction, I really do. But it’s impossible when you realize how easy it sometimes is. Knowing how many of these Gen Z girls are basically whores on the inside makes me feel more powerful than anything else in my life. It’s as if they’re just waiting for someone like me to give them an excuse.

Besides my three regulars, I saw two others this year just for a quick hit-and-run. One of them was a “once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.” She was barely 18, a virgin, but desperate for money. I didn’t hesitate. I made her mine, totally raw. I recorded everything on my phone while I came inside her, watching her face change as she realized what was happening. When I finished, I just threw the money on the bed with some extra for the morning-after pill and left. I never saw her again. Now she’s just a ghost, a memory on my computer.

My wife thinks we’re building a family. She thinks I’m this stable, boring guy who works hard for our future, who doesn’t drink or smoke. A geeky guy with geeky hobbies. She has no idea that while she’s out with her friends, I’m busy fucking 21-year-olds and making them mine. I’m addicted to the adrenaline, to the domination, and to the pure, total misogyny of it all. I love being the one who corrupts them.

I know I should stop, but why? As long as I don’t get caught, I’m living the darkest fantasy of any man.