Unsatisfied

Going after something easier to have a sense of accomplishment is certainly a quick escape to our problems. A quick fix, to get a temporary band aid over a problem, a situation, a broken heart. We as humans resort to quick stuff to cover up the big picture. Rejected by someone you liked? Why not go to someone you know likes you and will open up and give themselves to you easily? To not be so alone for a while.

But this is not satisfactory.

There I found myself, once again, on a stranger’s bed. The room was decorated with posh furniture and expensive looking paintings, could it be that this man was wealthy? I met him not long ago, just the night before, and I sure did not even remember where his house was located. I woke up next to the man in his bed covered with satin sheets, and stared at him. He looked peaceful while sleeping, his unkept beard giving him a playful look. I laid down again then closed my eyes to try and remember what had happened.

I met this man at a club, that much I knew was true. We probably danced and got drunk then left to his house. It was a wicked night; I have been club hopping every weekend since… I got rejected by someone I really liked. That made me sad and so I started to seek thrills with other people at clubs. So, this guy sleeping next to me is not the first of the string of lovers I’m leaving behind to cure the pain I felt… from the rejection.

We made out as we walked into the dimly lit room, then he turned out a small lamp on the table. He pinned me against the wall while we continued to kiss, then started to undress me. He was very skilled at undressing women, it seems, because he skillfully and swiftly got me naked while I was still pinned on the wall. Without taking a breath to stop kissing me and undress, he just did so while still kissing me.

Then he held me up and carried me princess style, then threw me on the bed. I spread my legs open and called for him, then he bent down before me and started to lick my pink pussy, then put a finger inside and started to finger me slowly. His beard felt spiky against my pussy, and he used his fingers to open it and go in with his tongue. I was getting really wet at that point so he just stood up and grabbed his cock, then plunged into me. I let out a loud moan as he made way into my pussy, then he followed by thrusting into me with force.

He continued to thrust as I moaned even louder than before, then pulled out quickly to slap my pussy with his cock rapidly, making me squirt a little. He proceed to put it back in, raised one leg and put it on the bed, then continued to fuck me. After a few moments, he pulled out and jerked off to let his load over my abdomen. He fell right next to me then we made out, and then took a shower together.

After the shower, we sat down on the bed and he made me suck his cock, until he came again in my mouth. Surprisingly it was a large load, and it was hard to swallow without spilling the cum out of my mouth. Afterwards we just fell asleep together, cuddling I believe, but we woke up on completely opposite sides of the bed. I opened my eyes after recalling everything that happened the last night, and was tearing up.

It was a good time, I can’t deny that. But I barely knew the man and he barely knew me. We just wanted a quick fix, and here we are after it, like two strangers sleeping together. And it came to my mind, how much I wish I was sleeping with Richard right now…

When I built up the courage to go tell Richard how I felt about him, after a year of crushing on him and rejecting other men for the thought of Richard, I found him with another girl. I was crushed in that moment, and had to pretend I was okay… that was over two months ago, and I’m still looking for love in all the wrong places. This bed I am in now, is one of these places.

But even then, I continue. To regain my lost time, to pretend I’m fine. Putting pieces of other broken hearts into my own broken heart to see if I can fix it. And in the end, I may fall in love again.