Old Feelings

Emma and I broke up two months ago, but it still feels like it happened yesterday. We were together for more than a year. You don’t just throw something like that away. I know that I can be an asshole sometimes, but I don’t understand why that meant that we had to break up. I’m still hoping that we’ll end up together, and last night was a good start.

I’ve been trying to get back out there, so I went to a party last night with a few of my friends. It was supposed to be a small get-together, but when we got there, it was a full-blown party. We got a few drinks and started to enjoy ourselves. It doesn’t hurt that I kick ass at beer pong. The music was amazing and people were reaching that part of the night where they don’t give a fuck. A ton of people were dancing and it was pretty fun to watch. I’m a terrible dancer, but I was trying to go along with it.

After another song, I went to get a new drink. While I was on my way there, I bumped into this cute girl. I let her go ahead of me and started thinking about how I could start a conversation with her. She was wearing a dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up and had a Venus tattoo on the inside of her left wrist, so I thought there was a pretty good chance she was gay. I saw that her Converse had a pretty cool design, so I decided to complement them and see where it went from there.

As I was working up my nerve, she stepped to the side to let somebody else get in line in front of her. I was about to say something until I looked up and saw that this new person was Emma. Fuck. I tried to look back down, but it was already too late. She saw me looking at her. I might as well say something now. I asked her how she’d been, and we went through the normal bullshit. She was doing fantastic, and she had been having a great month. I was happy for her, but I hated that she was so happy without me.

Then, she introduced this girl who I had bumped into, Amy, as her new girlfriend. My heart sunk. This cute girl was dating Emma, and Emma had already moved on. Thankfully, they were next in line, so we had to stop talking. I waited, got my drink, and went back to see my friends. That sucked, but I was determined to make sure that it didn’t ruin my night.

An hour or two later, the music was still going strong, but I needed to sit down. We grabbed a couch in the other room, and it was quiet enough that we could sort of talk. They mostly talked about some of the cute guys and girls they’d danced with. But, one of my friends mentioned that she thought she saw Emma. I told her she was right and let her know what had happened earlier that night. It sucked to relive, but she was really supportive.

One of my other friends overheard us, and he told me that he thought he’d seen her too. But, when he saw her, she was saying goodbye to some other girl. It turned out that Amy had left a little bit ago. I knew that didn’t mean anything, but I was hoping that Emma and I could talk or something. She’s still one of the most incredible women I’ve ever met, and I love how I feel whenever we talk.

I decided to go back to the room where everyone was dancing to see if Emma was still alone. My friends offered to come along. But, I told them that I’d probably be back pretty soon. Either way, they didn’t need to worry about it. I picked up my drink and went back to the heart of the party. I didn’t see Emma at first, so I just found a place to stand and finish off my drink. After a couple of minutes, I saw her dancing in the middle of the room.

She didn’t see me at first. But, as soon as she did, she locked eyes with me. Her lips pursed and she raised her eyebrows. I smiled back. I kept looking at her, but she moved her eyes down to check me out. Then, she started to grin. That made me smile wider, and I could see her eyes get bigger. It felt like it was lasting an eternity, in the best possible way.

I didn’t realize I was doing it, but I bit my lower lip. Although I stopped as soon as I realized, it didn’t matter. Emma had already seen it. She cocked her head and moved her eyes to look at the stairs. I knew what she was saying, but it couldn’t be true. I furrowed my eyebrows and gave her a confused look. She looked back at the stairs two more times, and each time that she did, she raised her eyebrows too. Fuck it. I knew that she probably just wanted to talk. It didn’t matter. No matter what, I wanted to spend more time with her.

I nodded, and Emma started walking toward the stairs. I followed her, and we went upstairs. It was deserted. While I was trying to figure out where we were going, Emma turned around and kissed me. I was surprised, but that only lasted for a second. My muscle memory kicked in, and we started kissing like nothing had changed. But, it was more intense. I felt more energized than I had been in two months.

I wrapped my arm around her lower back and started guiding her backward into one of the rooms. I didn’t know whose it was, but it was incredible. Small lights were draped down from the ceiling, and the bed looked so comfortable. I quietly kicked the door shut and kept walking toward the bed with Emma. She felt the bed behind her and sat down on it. I sat down next to her, and she lifted her left knee onto the bed to keep kissing me.

I leaned forward and pulled her closer to me while putting my right hand on the bed to prop myself up. Emma pulled her left leg onto the bed and wrapped her right leg around me. She slid her right hand down the side of my head and moved it down to grab my left side. I started to kiss her more slowly. She started tugging at the fabric on my shirt. I used my left hand to push her right leg down. I lifted my left knee and moved her right leg underneath me.

Emma slid her hand down to the top of my pants. She slipped one finger under the bottom of my shirt. She gently dragged the nail of her finger from my left side to the area directly underneath my belly button. I was starting to breathe more heavily, and Emma’s lips closed to form a smile. We continued kissing as she unbuttoned my pants and pulled down the zipper. She moved her hand and started massaging me above my underwear. I could feel my body relaxing. In a hushed whisper, I asked Emma whether she wanted me to lay down against the bed. She shook her head.

I broke our kiss, moved backward, and stood up at the end of the bed to take off my pants. I started moving back onto the bed, but Emma shook her head again. She said, “Boy shorts too.” So, I listened to her and took off my underwear too. I moved back on top of Emma. We continued kissing, and she slid her right leg between my upper thighs. It felt nice and cool. Emma moved her hand back to my left side. She moved a lot faster this time. She moved her right hand down and up my shirt to grip my left breast. It didn’t feel as good because I was still wearing a bra, but I didn’t care.

I don’t even know how long that lasted, but I was in heaven. Even when we had been together, I wasn’t used to Emma paying this much attention to me. Eventually, Emma moved her right leg back down and pulled her right hand down from under my shirt. I didn’t know what she wanted to do, so I waited. She hoisted herself up on her elbows and moved backward so that she was leaning against the headboard. After she was comfortable, she reached for my hand to pull me toward her. This was my cue. I repositioned myself over her right leg, but she pulled me closer.

Emma grabbed my butt with both hands and started pulling my hips toward her. Oh. That’s when I realized what she wanted to do. We’d only talked about it, and I never got the impression that she was up for it. I guess she’s gotten more adventurous.

I went as slow as she’d let me, and I started to position my knees on both sides of her shoulders. Emma gripped my ass harder and moved her head up. I could feel her warm breath as she kissed my upper thighs. She moved her mouth closer and started to kiss the outside of my lips. She kissed me harder, and I could feel her pushing forward with her tongue. She went slow, and I started to grind against her face. She grabbed my ass even harder and kissed me deeply. The pressure felt amazing.

Emma tilted her head up while dragging her lower lip against me. I waited for her to reposition her mouth, but I was surprised by how fast she found my clit. Holy shit. I could already feel myself starting to cum. I grabbed the headboard and pushed against her mouth. She sucked on my clit as hard as she could while I came on her face.

When my body relaxed, Emma started moving more slowly. She kissed my clit gently because it was so sensitive and occasionally tapped it with her tongue. It still felt amazing. I started thrusting my hips against her face and telling her to keep going. I was so thankful that she did. Suddenly, Emma lightly nibbled on my clit, and I could feel myself cumming again. This one was even longer, and it seemed like Emma was really getting into it. She started moaning softly, and it was the sexiest sound in the world.

My body calmed down again, and I moved my hips back and started moving off of Emma. When I looked down, I saw that she and the pillow underneath her were drenched. She saw me looking down at her and subtly licked her top lip. God, that was fucking sexy. I wanted her to fuck me again, but I knew that people were already starting to wonder where we went. I grabbed my clothes and got dressed as quickly as I could. We didn’t say anything else to each other, and I just walked back downstairs. I would still be happy if that was the last time that we’ll ever hook up, but I really fucking hope that it wasn’t.